The power of self-belief
Self-efficacy has been extensively studied in addiction recovery and is very beneficial. In simple terms, self-efficacy means the longer you’re sober and the more successes you have, the more you believe in yourself. As this continues, you will find navigating new, bigger challenges easier. Self-efficacy is a great predictor of continued sobriety and protection against relapse.
This means celebrating your successes and learning from your setbacks. Success breeds success, but setbacks also bring wisdom.
Self-sabotage can knock your confidence and breathe life into negative thought patterns and is closely linked to self-stigma and shame. These feelings stand in opposition to self-efficacy. If you believe you’re up to the challenge of recovery, you’re more likely to act in ways that make recovery more likely. If you’re caught up in shameful feelings, you’re more likely not to think you’re worthy of recovery and sabotage your progress.
There are things you can do to prepare for challenges and strengthen your long-term recovery plans.
Triggers
Recovery from drugs and recovery from alcoholism both involve knowing your triggers. Knowing your triggers is a great way to prepare for self-sabotage, and if you’ve written a relapse prevention plan, your triggers should form part of this.
Success can sometimes create new triggers, so remember that your relapse prevention plan is a living document that you can add to. New triggers that arise during your recovery can include telling yourself you deserve a reward for your progress or thinking about using it just once to celebrate. Be mindful of your triggers.
Because triggers are so personal, only you know what they are. They can be internal (feelings and emotions you previously controlled with substances) or external (places, people, times of day). Learn your triggers, and focus on creating healthy coping mechanisms to help you navigate them.
Coping mechanisms
Coping mechanisms are relapse prevention strategies you can put into practice when you can’t avoid a triggering situation or for sudden cravings. They can be short-term, like breathing exercises, or long-term practices you work on daily.
You can’t avoid all temptation and block all triggering situations, so build a solid suite of coping mechanisms in advance.
Short-term coping mechanisms can include reminding yourself of why you decided to get sober, calling a friend, distracting yourself, challenging thoughts about using and leaving a triggering situation.
Long-term coping mechanisms are practices that take you away from the triggering thoughts and back into the present moment. Breathing exercises, mindfulness and meditation all focus on bringing your awareness back to the present and calming you. This gives you greater control over your emotional state, and over time, you will feel less like reaching for something external to deal with your feelings.
Signs of relapse
Relapse is a gradual process with several stages, and recognising the signs early on will improve your chances of succeeding.
There are three stages of relapse.
If you’re going through a tough period, it’s time to return to your coping mechanisms and ask for help. If not caught early, emotional relapse can progress to the next stage.
This period is dangerous, and it’s when self-sabotage starts to gather steam. Remember that thoughts of using are normal, but you need to ask for help. Avoid high-risk situations, and reach out to friends or therapists to talk this through.
Getting help during any of the stages of relapse is vital, and this is why cultivating a strong support system for addiction help is important.
Support systems
Other people who care about you give you an outlet, keep you accountable, allow you to feel understood and less isolated.
Your support system may include friends and family, but therapists, members of support groups or fellow group therapy clients can also be included. Make sure you have someone to reach out to when you’re struggling.
Realistic expectations and achievable goals
Everyone stumbles, and it’s unrealistic to expect perfection. The best goals strike a balance between pushing your capabilities and being achievable.
Some goals will take time to achieve. You can achieve the goal of going to the pub with your friends, ordering an alcohol-free beer and not being tempted by cravings. This is not likely a realistic goal in early recovery and is something to aim for when you’re more secure in your sobriety. Take time to review your progress frequently and set new, realistic, achievable goals based on where you are in your recovery – and give yourself credit for achieving them.
Learning from setbacks
The most important thing to learn from your setbacks is that you can recover from them. View them as an opportunity for growth rather than a failure, and learn what to do and what not to do next time. Over time, your ability to handle tough situations will increase, and your desire to self-sabotage will decrease.