Things are never going to turn out exactly as you plan them. Life is full of uncertainty, so if you cannot find a way to live with this reality, it can lead to unnecessary anxiety and stress. This uncertainty does not have to be threatening at all, and you can learn to view it as the most wonderful thing about life. If you always knew what was going to happen next, what would be the point of being alive?
It is not the things that happen to you that are most important in life; it is how you perceive these things. If you learn to view uncertainty in a more positive way, it means that you will not feel so intimidated by it. You are unable to always decide on what is going to happen to you, but you do get to decide how you respond to those things. It is amazing how much a new perspective can change how you view the world, and this is something you always have the option of doing.
In order for you to be able to change your perspective on uncertainty, you need to have a good reason for doing it. One thing this new way of looking at the future can do is make worry appear a complete waste of time – if you have no real control over the future (other than trying your best today) what is the point in worrying about anything? This new outlook can be like taking a huge weight off your shoulders, meaning that you have far less stress in your life (as well as less illness due to stress).
One of the amazing things about uncertainty is what you end up with is often going to be better than what you were originally looking for. If you progress in sobriety, you can begin to live a life beyond your wildest imagination – and most of the good stuff will involve things you never planned.
One of the keys to developing a new perspective on uncertainty is to develop some faith. If you have no religious leanings, you may feel resistant to the idea of ‘faith’, but it is something that you already do without realising it – if you had no faith at all in life, you would spend all of your time checking things to make sure they were safe.
The faith you need to deal with uncertainty in life does not involve any type of miraculous intervention. It is just a simple belief that as long as you keep on trying to do your best, life will tend to work out okay for you. By doing good things today, you are planting positive karma seeds for the future – you just have to have faith that this means good things for you in the future.
One thing you need to understand about what is going to happen to you in the future is that the majority of events will be either positive or neutral. The bad stuff is actually the least likely to happen, so there is no real justification in always expecting the worst. If you can start to see uncertainty as a process that is just as likely to bring you the things you like then it makes it appear far less threatening.
Keeping a journal is a way of becoming more comfortable with uncertainty. This documenting of your life will clearly show you that most of the things you worry about never amount to anything. You will also get to see that some of the worst periods of your life occur when you do the most self-development – these bad days give you the skills needed to find real and lasting happiness.
One reason why individuals have a tendency to expect the worst in life is that they are dealing with low self-esteem. This means that they somehow feel deserving of punishment from the universe. You can build your self-esteem through self-compassion and by setting yourself goals and achieving them. If low self-esteem is a serious issue for you, it can also be a good idea to spend time with a therapist.